Article: Anti-childhood sexual abuse spaces have a transphobia problem [Long version]

Please note: This is the longer version of an article which I wrote for Shado Magazine. As part of the editing process, a lot of this writing got cut and we agreed that I could post it on our site for anyone who wishes to see the behind the scenes process!

“We live in a world where we think it’s okay that children are exposed to explicit content

at a very young age.”

My interest is peaked by the Instagram Reel on my timeline.

“I’ve had people send me videos of children’s toys that make inappropriate noises when

they are pressed on their intimate parts.”

I am worried about what I hear, but I’m not surprised. I carry on watching.

Children are allowed to have drag queens, a form of

adult entertainment [...] where children are going to pride events where men are in

cages dressed in dog leads...”

My initial interest in this video turns into confusion, and ultimately fear.

The video proceeds to show quotes from doctors who are against gender-affirming treatment, accompanied by images of Lil Nas X, a gay rapper, singing to children. A voiceover says “They take the young, they make them into a celebrity so you have an idol to worship and then they slowly destruct them,” before cutting to clips of Lil Nas X’s “Call me by your name” music video, where he lap dances on a depiction of himself as the devil.

All 61 comments of the video comments are extremely supportive, and some went as far as to suggest that taking your child to Pride events is wrong.

This video was posted by Samantha Browne, a human trafficking survivor and anti-trafficking activist. She was trafficked within the porn industry and then into a satanist sex ring. Now she speaks against child sex trafficking and shares how it can be prevented , such as addressing the lack of labour regulations for performers in the adult entertainment industry, which can lead to minors being exploited in porn. But this video left me questioning her current approach.

During this video, she vocalised her affiliation with Gays Against Groomers, an American far-right organization known for campaigning against gender-affirming care for minors, criticizing Drag Queen Story Hour events, and opposing trans women being part of women’s survivor spaces.

What started as a search to find other people fighting child sexual abuse ended with me accidentally consuming anti-trans propaganda.

This is not the first time that I’ve seen transphobic material on child sexual abuse activism sites. In March 2023, I established Secrets Worth Sharing, a CIC that gives people practical and approachable advice on how to talk about childhood sexual abuse.

Many of these platforms misdirect these feelings of injustice towards trans and queer people to falsely assert that all trans people are perpetrators and make the damaging argument that trans people existing, or anyone questioning a gender identity, is damaging to a child’s sexual safety.

I am not trans or a drag performer, but have tried to build a movement that welcomes and actively includes people with these backgrounds in child sexual abuse prevention. The conversations they bring to the space have greatly added to my learnings about sexual abuse, and you will hear from some of them below.

Ebony with an example of the sort of dress she would

wear to perform to children.

Unveiling Transphobia in childhood sexual abuse advocacy

Intersectionality is central to my approach: I believe these experiences do not exist in a vacuum and other parts of our identity affect how we process and experience abuse.

When I started following other social media accounts speaking out against childhood sexual abuse, my recommended videos started becoming anti-trans. I saw increased messaging in my feed about how we should conform to traditional gender stereotypes. I saw more reels talk about removing “men” (in this case, used as a slur used for trans women) from survivor support services. They were telling me to be wary of drag performances as they groom children.

Clearly, the algorithms were picking up on a trend: to be anti-child sex abuse is to be anti-trans. Fighting for a world where children are free from sexual abuse is to be exposed to harmful propaganda in the process.

These accounts reflect a significant rise in transphobia in recent years. The end of 2024 saw 672 anti-trans bills passed in the United States alone with the rise in public anti-trans sentiment. Florida passed the “don’t say gay” bill, which bans discussions of sexual orientation and gender identity at schools. Far-right politicians in America are using drag queens as props of fear in the debate on sexual violence.

Them magazine, an American online LGBT magazine, wrote how researchers found a 406% increase in tweets using “groomer” or “pedophile” in relation to queer people since the controversial Florida law was passed. Gays against Groomers are a great example of how anti-trans activists pit different people in the queer community against each other as we scramblefor human rights and representation.

This isn’t just in the States. One major UK case study for the crossover between childhood sexual abuse and transness was the conservative government’s interpretation of Della’s law. This legislation is named after Della Wright, a child sexual abuse survivor who has been been fighting for a law to prevent convicted child sex offenders from changing their name so they are easier to track and be convicted. I support this campaign because it gives people an informed choice about whether they want to interact with someone who has been on the child sex offender register.

But in October 2023, MP Suella Braverman announced that she is going ban sex offenders from changing their name and gender. In her speech, Braverman states: "I don't care if anyone thinks this is interfering with their human rights... It's time to worry less about the rights of sexual predators and more about the rights of victims." This pushes harmful ideas that changing your gender identity results in a ‘privilege’ to navigate the legal and justice system – something that many non-abusing trans people would disagree with. Since then, Della’s law has been passed, but thankfully only focuses on stopping offenders changing their name.

Then there was the growing scrutiny drag queens reading stories to children. “Drag Tales” experienced a rise in attacks in summer 2023, where protests by far-right activists occurred outside places like Honor Oak pub.

And this affects the non-profit sector, with many funders opting out of funding childhood sexual abuse survivor support if they are openly queen or trans affirming spaces.

While I recognise that bravery it takes to share personal stories of sexual assault and appreciate how these platforms can give survivors pivotal avenues to heal and accept themselves.

On the other hand, part of me can’t help thinking appealing to the visceral trauma associated with survivors of child sexual abuse is a tactical mechanism to encourage anti-trans ideology. I’m here to offer an alternative to these arguments, one that is rooted in the belief that it is possible to be in an anti child-sex-abuse movement that supports trans people. In fact, it is the best way, as intersections are so crucial to our experience of abuse and recognising them is the only way to ensure we are able to support all people who experience abuse.

Unveiling Transphobia in childhood sexual abuse advocacy

Intersectionality is central to my approach: I believe these experiences do not exist in a vacuum and other parts of our identity affect how we process and experience abuse.

When I started following other social media accounts speaking out against childhood sexual abuse, my recommended videos started becoming anti-trans. I saw increased messaging in my feed about how we should conform to traditional gender stereotypes. I saw more reels talk about removing “men” (in this case, used as a slur used for trans women) from survivor support services. They were telling me to be wary of drag performances as they groom children.

Clearly, the algorithms were picking up on a trend: to be anti-child sex abuse is to be anti-trans. Fighting for a world where children are free from sexual abuse is to be exposed to harmful propaganda in the process.

These accounts reflect a significant rise in transphobia in recent years. The end of 2024 saw 672 anti-trans bills passed in the United States alone with the rise in public anti-trans sentiment. Florida passed the “don’t say gay” bill, which bans discussions of sexual orientation and gender identity at schools. Far-right politicians in America are using drag queens as props of fear in the debate on sexual violence.

Them magazine, an American online LGBT magazine, wrote how researchers found a 406% increase in tweets using “groomer” or “pedophile” in relation to queer people since the controversial Florida law was passed. Gays against Groomers are a great example of how anti-trans activists pit different people in the queer community against each other as we scramblefor human rights and representation.

This isn’t just in the States. One major UK case study for the crossover between childhood sexual abuse and transness was the conservative government’s interpretation of Della’s law. This legislation is named after Della Wright, a child sexual abuse survivor who has been been fighting for a law to prevent convicted child sex offenders from changing their name so they are easier to track and be convicted. I support this campaign because it gives people an informed choice about whether they want to interact with someone who has been on the child sex offender register.

But in October 2023, MP Suella Braverman announced that she is going ban sex offenders from changing their name and gender. In her speech, Braverman states: "I don't care if anyone thinks this is interfering with their human rights... It's time to worry less about the rights of sexual predators and more about the rights of victims." This pushes harmful ideas that changing your gender identity results in a ‘privilege’ to navigate the legal and justice system – something that many non-abusing trans people would disagree with. Since then, Della’s law has been passed, but thankfully only focuses on stopping offenders changing their name.

Then there was the growing scrutiny drag queens reading stories to children. “Drag Tales” experienced a rise in attacks in summer 2023, where protests by far-right activists occurred outside places like Honor Oak pub.

And this affects the non-profit sector, with many funders opting out of funding childhood sexual abuse survivor support if they are openly queen or trans affirming spaces.

While I recognise that bravery it takes to share personal stories of sexual assault and appreciate how these platforms can give survivors pivotal avenues to heal and accept themselves.

On the other hand, part of me can’t help thinking appealing to the visceral trauma associated with survivors of child sexual abuse is a tactical mechanism to encourage anti-trans ideology. I’m here to offer an alternative to these arguments, one that is rooted in the belief that it is possible to be in an anti child-sex-abuse movement that supports trans people. In fact, it is the best way, as intersections are so crucial to our experience of abuse and recognising them is the only way to ensure we are able to support all people who experience abuse.

Prince (they/them)
a trans person, drag king, performance artist and organiser

Distinguishing between trans identities and drag performance

Not all drag is sexually explicit: Drag is simply any performance that explores gender

The first place to start is making the distinction between drag, a type of performance and transness, which is a gender identity.

Drag performers and trans people are not the same. A trans person is a person whose gender identity does not correspond with the sex registered for them at birth. Anyone can do drag, regardless of gender identity. But unlike being trans, “drag generally refers to a kind of consciously artistic performance intended for an audience. In contrast, trans people do not seek primarily to entertain,” writes trans academic Harper Keenan and drag performer Lil’ Miss Hot Mess. There can be crossovers with the two, but they are not the same.

I interviewed two people who were pivotal to this article: Prince (they/them), a trans person and drag king, performance artist and organiser and Ebony Rose Dark (they/she/all pronouns), a drag queen and cabaret dance performance artist.

Prince has been performing for almost a decade, and is the co-founder of Brighton King Night – the city’s biggest drag king night. “A lot of people misunderstand drag by holding a reductionist view that it is only a cisgender man in a dress. The way we describe it is taking gender and experimenting with it,” they explain.

Prince has hosted drag performers who are hyper-feminine, others who are clowns who blend burlesque into their performance and some who dress like gremlins. “There is no one way to perform drag – it is whatever you want it to be. Some people love to go on stage and have a persona. Some people, like me, like to merge parts of myself with the person I take on stage,” they tell me.

While Prince started doing drag to explore a “sexy, charismatic and chubby boy” persona, it was through performing that they started to explore their journey of transition.

So for Prince, there is a link with their drag and their transness. However, they stress that these are still very distinct from each other. “I have autism and a lot of people are surprised to hear that I can be awkward outside of performing,” they laugh. Where drag performances provide a space for them to bring some aspects of their identity to the stage, many other parts of their identity are also explored privately as a trans person navigating their daily life

Ebony noticed that many arguments against drag performances around children implied that all drag was sexual in nature. They remind us that not all drag is sexual, in the same way that not all art performances are sexual. They highlight that "for drag, “tThere’s not a basic community foundation of what drag and cabaret is,” which makes itso it can be really difficult for people in the general public to know what drag is outside of Ru Paul’s Drag race.This But that is only a very small part of the scene.

Of course, there are drag performances that are sexually explicit and not appropriate for children, but most tailor their performances in an age-appropriate way.

“If I did go to schools, I will be going with sophistication and class.” Ebony says. “I would go out of my way to play with how it could be interesting for the children, like the patterns on my dress. They don’t need to see my legs. They need to see my face, or hear my voice, (especially if they can’t see). There’s a way of doing it that could be amazing for the children”.

These types of performances use clothing, colour and gender to teach and entertain children and are often seen in the family friendly sections of Pride marches.

Do I think, however rarely, that some drag performers overstep the mark by performing extreme sexual content in front of children? Absolutely. Do I think some non-drag queens overstep the mark too? Absolutely. Do I think drag should be banned? Absolutely not.

It is important to distinguish the false parallel drawn between transness and drag as this underlying assumption is used by gender-critical “activists” that I’ve had the misfortune of coming across online. Their flawed logic suggests that trans folks and drag performers alike are engaging in a hypersexual form of “dress up”, and this is inherently harmful for children to see.

Using anti-trans rhetoric to frame drag performances as inappropriate for children entirely misses the freedom and safety that drag provides for so many, regardless of their gender expression. It also (maybe deliberately) does not take into account the fact that there are many drag performances which are totally appropriate for, and tailored to, children.

An alternative discourse

I recognise the huge amount of bravery that goes into sharing personal stories of sexual assault. I still appreciate some of the messages of support that these platforms can give to survivors and how pivotal these social media accounts can be for people’s healing and acceptance.

I’m here to offer an alternative to these arguments, one that is rooted in the belief that it is possible to be in an anti child-sex-abuse movement that supports trans people. In fact, it is the best way, as intersections are so crucial to our experience of abuse and recognising them is the only way to ensure we are able to support all people who experience abuse.

Framing the opposition, and leaning into nuance

Using the disgust factor to build a flawed logic

Most of the anti-drag videos I watch have a flawed logic. They focus on taking one argument, adding something that is unrelated and drawing dangerous and coopted opinions from them.

The first part of the argument starts with something that most people would agree with: that forcing children to engage in sexually explicit acts is wrong.

The second part of the argument takes this a step further to argue that sexually explicit performances around children forces them to engage in these sexually explicit acts. To demonstrate this idea, videos will typically merge together clips of more sexually explicit performances with drag queens talking to children.

From this comes the dangerous conclusion: “Drag queens, through their sexually explicit performances, force children to engage in sexually explicit content, which is wrong.”

Like any form of sexually explicit material, some – like informative age-appropriate sex education – will be appropriate for children, wheras some – like encouraging a toddler to get a lap dance, as shown in Samantha’s video – will not be.

The arguments progress to something like this: There is at least one person in the world who is a drag queen and is trans. Some drag queens, through their sexually explicit performances, force children to engage in these sexually explicit acts. This is the same conclusion derived from the first argument, but has weaponised transness from the outset. Then their faulty conclusion is that all trans people force children to engage in sexually explicit content, which is wrong.

Many people who are opposed to trans and drag inclusion in survivor spaces subscribe to one (or all) of the following views:

Drag is a sexually explicit art and a form of childhood sexual abuse because it forces children to engage in sexually explicit material through events like Pride and Drag storytime
Abusers use trans identity to manipulate access to survivor spaces and places where they can abuse, therefore trans people should not be trusted.

My argument develops the following alternatives, centred around thinking that although there are ‘some’ of these cases, it doesn’t mean that ‘all’ of these cases are.

Drag is simply any performance that explores gender: Some drag performances are sexually explicit, but not all of them. In fact, some drag performances can be a healthy way to explore gender and be a performance outlet to improve children’s wellbeing.
Abuse exists everywhere, regardless of someone’s gender identity: while there are some trans people who are sexually abuse children, certainly not all of them do.
In fact, statistically, transgender people are more likely to be survivors of sexual abuse than perpetrators of it, and are a lot less likely to find affirming support spaces after abuse. This is the injustice we should be focusing on instead.

Drag performers and trans people are not the same. A trans person is a person whose gender identity does not correspond with the sex registered for them at birth. Anyone can do drag, regardless of gender identity. But unlike being trans, “drag generally refers to a kind of consciously artistic performance intended for an audience. In contrast, trans people do not seek primarily to entertain,” writes trans academic Harper Keenan and drag performer Lil’ Miss Hot Mess. There can be crossovers with the two, but they are not the same.

I interviewed two people who were pivotal to this article: Prince (they/them), a trans person and drag king and Ebony Rose Dark (they/she/all pronouns), a drag queen and cabaret dance performance artist.

Prince has been performing for over eight years, and co-founded Brighton King Night - Brighton’s biggest drag king night. They explain that “a lot of people who don’t understand drag think that drag is a man in a dress. The way we describe it is ‘taking gender and experimenting with it’.” They’ve seen drag performers who are hyper-feminine, others who are clowns who blend burlesque into their performance and some who dress like gremlins.“There is no one way to do drag, it’s whatever you want it to be. Some people love to go on stage and have a persona. Some people, like me, like to merge myself with the person I take on stage.”.

Prince started doing drag to explore a “sexy, chubby boy” persona and through this journey they started to transition. “A lot of people are surprised I’m really awkward and autistic outside of performing”, they laugh. The drag performance is a side of them that they choose to put on stage, and the other aspects of their identity is explored as a trans person navigating the world.

Ebony noticed that many arguments against drag performances around children implied that all drag was sexual in nature. They remind us that not all drag is sexual, in the same way that not all art performances are sexual. “There’s not a basic community foundation of what drag and cabaret is,” which makes it difficult for the general public to know what drag is outside of Ru Paul’s Drag race.This is only a very small part of the scene.

Of course, there are drag performances that are sexually explicit and not appropriate for children, but most tailor their performances in an age-appropriate way.

“If I did go to schools, I will be going with sophistication and class.” Ebony says. “I would go out of my way to play with how it could be interesting for the children, like the patterns on my dress. They don’t need to see my legs. They need to see my face, or hear my voice,especially if they can’t see. There’s a way of doing it that could be amazing for the children”.

These types of performances use clothing, colour and gender to teach and entertain children and are often seen in the family friendly sections of Pride marches.

Do I think, however rarely, that some drag performers overstep the mark by performing extreme sexual content in front of children? Absolutely. Do I think some non-drag queens overstep the mark too? Absolutely. Do I think drag should be banned? Absolutely not.

Ebony Rose Dark (they/she/ all)
Drag queen and cabaret dance performance artist

Support services ignoring trans people who are more likely to be survivors than abusers

In the haste to discriminate against all trans people and drag performers by labelling them groomers, we forget that many trans people are far more likely to have experienced sexual abuse themselves than to be perpetrators of it. Prince is one of those people, a trans drag king and a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Drag and transitioning has been such a powerful experience for them to come to terms with their own gender and sexuality. Yet the very medium that helped Prince to heal is being weaponised against them and people like them.

It feels easier for us to point to ‘the other’ when we think about those who sexually abuse children. Often, trans people and drag performers are already othered in society, making it easy for them to become a target. Prince says they “come from a background in neuroscience and notes the scientific literature that shows many human beings love putting their environment into categories and boxes, like binary and non-binary, as they are looking for patterns to help them process the world.” “But not all humans rely on this categorical binary thinking to help them understand the world around them, such as those with neurodivergencies like myself.”

Sometimes we feel the need to conform to these patterns, even if we feel like there are outliers. For instance, if you are taught that your relatives are supposed to always love and care for you, it can be easy to overlook situations of abuse if a loved one is acting in a sexual way that contradicts that behaviour. This is often why abuse goes underreported or unnoticed for years.

When trans children are sexually abused, their trans experiences are often diminished. An trans person who wants to stay anonymous told me that they have lived experience of F2M (female to male) trans people who are survivors of childhood sexual abuse are interpreted as “traumatised abused girls”, and M2F (male to female) trans people are labelled as ‘men’ who are using trans identity to disguise themselves to abuse other people. Some people even go as far to lobby for non-trans people in survivor support spaces, believing that trans survivors are ‘abusers in disguise’. This harmful thinking makes it even more difficult for trans survivors to access support in a situation of abuse and fuels a global lack of research in this space for fear of being seen as ‘too controversial’.

“A lot of what we do in trans activism is advocating for and supporting the trans youth,” Prince says. This includes trusting children to know their own gender identity, as well as knowing when they are uncomfortable and encouraging them to trust their gut reaction to an abusive situation. The belief that all trans people are perpetrators, ignores the realities for trans kids. The focus has been shifted into the wrong place. We should be focusing on the survivors themselves. We need to trust children more in situations like this. They need to be believed a lot of the time.”

Is it possible to accept part of someone’s activism but not all of it?

It hurts me so much that the area of activism that I want to dedicate my life to is steeped in such anti-transness. While I agree with some of basic messages of child protection that these groups lean on, I don’t think it’s possible to get behind movements which are so steeped in hate for another community –especially one that has a high percentage of survivor of sexual abuse.

There are many activists that prove you can be pro-trans, pro-drag and fight childhood sexual abuse, like the trans attorney Kristen Browdem, who talks about the statistical probably of a trans person being a offender compared to other more likely groups, like family members, friends and religious leaders. The Connecticut Alliance to End Sexual Violence have some great stats, figures and advice about LGBT+ inclusive ways on having a conversation about grooming with your children.

We are a trans and queer inclusive community and we encourage the following values:

Stop framing and centring childhood sexual abuse as a women’s issue or a gendered violence issue. It is a violence against children issue, and tying the crime to the theme of gender identity can imply that one fuels the other, or that abuse towards some sexual organs are 'more harmful/ worse' than others. This thinking also further alienates male survivors.
Be aware of any content which shows very explicit material, and then links it with an identity factor. Usually these are emotive tactics that rely on shock value to get people on side with harmful ideas.
Question laws which discriminate against the identity of one group for the protection of children.
All sexual abuse is abuse. Do not put different victims experiences’ against each other. We try to understand that their beliefs may stem from personal experiences. However, it does not make it okay to generalise these experiences against all groups.
When we see or hear of sexually abusive behaviour from someone, we do not generalise to say that their actions are a result of their identity group. This holds true for trans people as well as religious leaders, and people from minoritised cultures.

If we are to believe in a future free from childhood sexual abuse, we must accept all identities, especially trans ones. Anyone is subject to being a potential victim and childhood sexual abuse activism spaces should welcome these identities so that we are better equipped to support people from a diversity of sexual abuse experiences. It’s the only way we can prevent abuse.

The very existence of trans survivors and drag performers like Prince serve as living defiance against these harmful messages in childhood sexual abuse advocacy.

“As a trans person, I’ve realised there are so many people who don’t want me to exist. It’s not okay, but I need to focus my energy in other places. To try and empower people like me, to think about if I was to become a parent, how I could recognise abuse and teach my children differently. Your concern is not us, it’s abusers”.

What you can do

Check out Secrets Worth Sharing Trans statement, which includes examples on how they practice being trans and queer inclusive.
Donate to The Good Law Project who are going to challenge the ruling on defining a woman
Donate to or volunteer with The Survivor's Network, Mind Out and The Clare Project, two Brighton-based organisations which support trans people who have experienced abuse. Alternatively you can support Galop, London’s LGBT anti-violence & abuse charity
Support Drag Queen story hour and book a drag queen to read stories in your local community space
Sign the petition to Overturn the UK's New Legal Definition of a Woman
Email childhood sexual abuse survivor support services to demand that there are specific and safe services available for trans people
Email your MP to Ban Conversion Practices as part of the Stonewall petition.
Ask organisations that work with children, like GP surgeries and schools, what policies and training they have in place to protect children from grooming and sexual abuse and how they educate on gender, sex and sexuality, as well as the organisation’s stance on ‘single sex spaces’.. Ensure that no anti-trans or drag ideologies affect these teachings.
Use this article to challenge people in your life who promote or believe the lie that trans-people and drag queens are dangerous to children.

A special thanks to Prince, R and Ebony for taking their time to share their thoughts with me, thoughts which were pivotal to this article. Additional thanks to SN, Bill Urquhart, Sherlyn Assam and Isabella, Jeevan and Hannah from Shado for their help with editing the final article.