Older People
How are older people impacted by a history of childhood sexual abuse?
What does healing from CSA look like over a lifetime? Are their parallels between the abuse of today, and the abuse of over 50 years ago? And how can experiences of trauma be channelled into creativity? Sophia (she/her), founder of Secrets Worth Sharing, is joined by Patrick (he/him), the award-winning director of GROOMED, to discuss.
Your Hosts
Sophia — Founder of Secrets Worth Sharing
Sophia (she/her) is a survivor of child sexual abuse, designer and the founder of Secrets Worth Sharing, where she builds a community of having these difficult conversations with 'serious joy'.
Patrick — Theatre Director & Advocate
Patrick (he/him) is a professional theatre director and his play, also a film, GROOMED, won three awards at the Brighton Fringe. Patrick is a committed advocate for both male and female survivors, independently and through the Brave Movement.
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To recap
Things you should say/do when working with older survivors
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There is a lack of representation when it comes to survivors living full, long lives filled with joy, whilst simultaneously working on healing. We can find this representation in older people. Rather than neglecting to include older survivors in our conversations about childhood sexual abuse, we should instead be drawing from their wisdom and experiences to tackle CSA as a multi-generational issue.
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Older people are regularly desexualised and erased from conversations about sex and sexuality. But many older survivors of CSA have spent years working on their own sexual healing after trauma, and have valuable insights to impart. Also, by opening up conversations about sex to include all generations, we encourage older people to talk freely about a topic that has historically been viewed as shameful or taboo.
Things you shouldn't say/do
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Healing from childhood sexual abuse isn’t like healing from a broken ankle. It isn’t simple or linear and can affect somebody’s core identity for the rest of their lives. It can be easy to view someone’s trauma from 50+ years ago and feel that it no longer affects their life today but, for many, their trauma has shaped who they are as people and the memories and emotions still have an impact.
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In a society that values youth, people tend to disregard older people and assume that their experiences of childhood sexual abuse are no longer relevant in today’s world. But, in reality, there are many parallels between CSA today and CSA in the past. We have a lot to learn from older people, who have the expertise of living a lifetime following on from abuse, and the challenges and joys that accompany being a survivor.
Additional resources
GROOMED – Patrick’s short film inspired by his own experience of CSA, available on YouTube to watch for free
Brave Movement – a survivor-centered global movement working to end childhood sexual violence
The economic and social cost of contact child sexual abuse - a report on the economic and social cost of contact child sexual abuse in England and Wales
We Are Survivors Open Letter - open letter to the government stating that 14 million adults live with the trauma of childhood sexual abuse
Alice Nebel Pilates – online and in-person pilates classes including one for the over 60s
Body Electric – a documentary showcasing the history of queer culture and its fixation on the body, investigating its growth, the impact of the AIDS crisis, and the effects of social media
The Body Keeps The Score – a 2014 book by Bessel van der Kolk about the purported effects of psychological trauma
Fight, Flight, Freeze & Fawn - information from WebMD about the four bodily responses to trauma
Secrets Worth Sharing Shado article – an article written by our founder, Sophia, on transphobia in VAWG spaces
Transgender people over four times more likely than cisgender people to be victims of violent crime – a study by the UCLA School of LAW exploring rates of violence against trans people
Mankind - a charity for men in England and Wales affected by unwanted sexual experiences
Patrick’s story – Patrick shares how he has used theatre as a way to tell the story of the abuse he experienced as a child
*Please note - in sharing resources mentioned by our co-hosts, we are not necessarily endorsing all of their content, but we do so to allow you to make up your own mind.
