Humour
Join Sophia and comedian Jonny Pelham as he shares his experiences writing and performing his set for Live At the Apollo, which focused on his experiences of childhood sexual abuse.
Main Video
When is it appropriate to use humour and comedy to talk about traumatic experiences like childhood sexual abuse? How can this actually help to educate us better about support? Join Sophia and comedian Jonny Pelham as he shares his experiences writing and performing his set for Live At the Apollo, which focused on his experiences of childhood sexual abuse.
Your Hosts
Sophia — Founder of Secrets Worth Sharing
Sophia (she/her) is a survivor of child sexual abuse, designer and the founder of Secrets Worth Sharing, where she builds a community of having these difficult conversations with 'serious joy'.
Jonny Pelham - Stand-Up Comedian
Jonny (he/him) is a British stand-up comedian and writer. In 2019, he wrote an Edinburgh Fringe stand-up show, about his childhood sexual abuse, called Off Limits. He went on to deliver this at Live at the Apollo and then host a Channel 4 documentary about abuse.
Bonus Content: Dos and Don’ts Video
Join Sophia and comedian Jonny Pelham as he shares his experiences writing and performing his set for Live At the Apollo, which focused on his experiences of childhood sexual abuse.
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To recap
Things you should say/do
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There are many different ways to respond to childhood sexual abuse, and for some people, the healing outlet is comedy. When practiced properly, it can be a powerful tool to create an approachable environment to explore abuse.
[As a comedian] Allow people to have their own reactions to comedy; some people may react well whilst others may feel triggered.
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Often we find that people tell stories of abuse as part of their comedy, but it is important to challenge where this comes from.
An example of this is a few comedians might make light of serious people's lived experiences with abuse, without actually having their own story or experience with this. Unfortunately, certain topics guarantee a reaction from an audience i.e. ‘paedophilia’; consider finding your own voice in comedy and not relying on using CSA as a punchline.
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We need more ways to make space for these topics to be discussed within a joyful, hopeful outlet just like in this podcast. Do remember if you're going to disclose something personal, think about the consequences of it, in a positive and negative way. Talking about these topics could help another person open up
Things you shouldn't say/do
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Often when someone discloses their experience with CSA, someone may make a joke or make light of their experience to feel less anxious, but it is important to make sure you are making the survivor feel heard rather than dismissed. You can connect with people safely and respectfully through comedy, rather than saying something offensive.Sit in the moment when someone tells you their story, and don't use them telling you this as a 'pass' to make a joke of it. For example, saying ‘I always thought you were a bit weird’ in response to someone disclosing their abuse is NOT an acceptable response.
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Some comedy skits make light of CSA and this can be traumatic and triggering for survivors as well as children included in the comedy. Remember that children cannot consent to comedy and therefore we should not use them as any part of the ‘joke’. Children should never be the punchline of ANY of your material, regardless of what you’re talking about.
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When someone is sharing something personal, be mindful not to 'dive in' and try to involve yourself in the joke. Also remember that if you are going to speak to an audience about a sensitive topic, give them space to leave the room without fear of being ‘called out’ in a comedy show setting. Be mindful of the impact of your words on survivors for the rest of the show, and beyond.
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Instead of joking about someone's lived experience, the joke can instead be about society's response. The comedic element lies in where certain individuals don’t know how to deal with these difficult topics. Some survivors admit that humour can be helpful and fulfilling at times: ‘if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry’. However, this is dependent on the survivor to choose to include it in their comedy. Remember that you can talk about CSA with a tonal variety.
Additional resources and tips
Watch Jonny’s Channel 4 Documentary, Let’s Talk: Childhood Sexual Abuse
*Please note - in sharing resources mentioned by our co-hosts, we are not necessarily endorsing all of their content, but we do so to allow you to make up your own mind.
Production Crew / Special Thanks
Camera and Sound - Polly & Sarah from Broadcast Revolution
Editing and Subtitles - Tom Eames
Special thanks to Sheeraz Gulsher, for putting us in touch with Broadcast Revolution and the Studio Team.
Special Thanks to Roxy Van der Post, one of our former crew who put us in touch with our editor, Tom!
